Here was an appalling fact: all her previous loneliness had been trifling beside that which now encompassed her and would for years to come. “A girl needs her mother most exactly when she thinks she doesn’t. There was no answer. “Both. "But never mind who, or what I am. But in between these wider phases of comparative confidence were gaps of disconcerting doubt, when the universe was presented as making sinister and threatening faces at her, defying her to defy, preparing a humiliating and shameful overthrow. ' That has always haunted me.
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